Walking across a really crowded Costco parking lot a few days ago I noticed someone smile at me. It was a real smile, a hopeful, kind, no-agenda smile. I instinctively blurted out “you have a great smile”. I’m prone to such things. She slowed down as if processing what I was saying. She replied “thank […]
Just be kind; we are all stressed Read More »
Blog, Dark Clouds, Inspiring, It will be okay, Tool Box
Over two hours to clean less than 150 ft2 of a wooden deck. But, boy did I learn a lot! I can always learn a lot if I just pay attention, if I am simply present and curious. It really doesn’t matter what the activity is and it really doesn’t even matter what the lessons
What I learned cleaning the deck Read More »
Blog, How Stuff Works, It will be okay
Control is an illusion. Actually, everything is an illusion, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I’ve struggled with emotional regulation essentially for as long as I can remember. Somedays (like today) when I am really challenged I start down one of many unhealthy spirals. Sometimes I catch myself and sometimes not. Sometimes friends and
Control is an illusion Read More »
Blog, How Stuff Works, It will be okay, Tool Box
This is a post about agency. It is also about determination and hope. It began life as an exploration on whether honesty is dead or not but I needed something much lighter and more hopeful today. At this moment I need to cry tears of joy and appreciation and not those of fear. I feel
We choose where we place our gaze Read More »
Blog, Dark Clouds, Inspiring, It will be okay, Tool Box
There is so much to learn. For a day, or really better yet a lifetime, just observe. Don’t judge, which will help prevent getting angry or feeling entitled or any of those other distracting things. Just observe. What makes me mad? How does my body feel when this or that happens or is said or
Just be an observer for a day Read More »
Blog, Inspiring, Play Spaces, Tool Box
Is everyone simple like me? I know that it can be a dangerous trap to fall into thinking that everyone is like us. The average of one million and a negative million is zero, just as is the average of one and minus one or a single ten and ten negative ones. Is everyone else
Is everyone simple like me? Read More »
Blog, How Stuff Works, Inspiring
If you look at most any problem in the world, poverty, war, genocide, environmental destruction, all the biggies, and the smaller ones playground fights, cheating on tests, the FBS bowl selection committee process (!), they all begin with fear. Fear of not getting our fair share, fear of not having enough to go around, fear
Fear is the root of all evil Read More »
Blog, Dark Clouds, How Stuff Works, It will be okay
Lately I am just feeling like a number, a statistic. Feeling like all decisions are being made for me to maximize someone else’s shareholder return (and executive bonuses). My fantastically complicated and sophisticated computer is just fine, it is just that the little screws and hinges and other dumb things are falling apart (when they
Do my shoes really need planned obsolescence? Read More »
Blog, How Stuff Works, Inspiring, It will be okay
I have been thinking about opportunity costs as a concept a lot over the last several years. I was amazed to find that I can’t find where I have written about it. It is a really powerful camouflaged threat to happiness that many don’t realize. I sure didn’t for most of my life. It may
Don’t ignore opportunity costs Read More »
Blog, How Stuff Works, It will be okay, Tool Box
Sometimes I read or hear of an idea and it is like a lightning bolt. I can feel the neurons reorganizing; pruning the old rotting branches. I can see the new yellow-green buds forming and popping into life. Yesterday was one of those days. I have been thinking about boundaries all wrong. I suspect we
I’ve been thinking about boundaries all wrong Read More »
Blog, How Stuff Works, Inspiring, It will be okay, Tool Box