The title of this piece is attributed to Marianne Williamson. Ever since I read this quote on a website several years ago it has haunted me. I know it is true for me. I know that it is largely what has kept me in a near constant state of fear unable to take risks for so many years.
I’m afraid of failing; aren’t most of us? But what is the (opportunity) cost associated with not trying, not risking? What if? What if my ideas for a particular non-profit actually did work (IcanDoBetter.org)? What if my and my wife’s idea for “Joy Division” talks cultivated love and understanding here in Seattle and then in a few other cities and eventually changed the trajectory of war and poverty and addiction, even if just a tiny bit? What if people wanted to buy my art and it brought them joy and they shared that joy with others and the world got a teeny weeny bit healthier? Am I really so fragile as to not be able to handle finding out that my ideas and skills are not powerful or useful? What if they are? What if the main thing holding us collectively in a state of dis-ease is just our own inaction, our own fear, our own self-doubt? What if we really are powerful? Thank God Rosa Parks didn’t think that way or Fred Rogers or so many other brave people.
As I move deeper into middle-age the guilt and shame of looking back on years of inaction can be overwhelming. I could have done so much more had I started ten years ago, twenty. But I didn’t. But I can start today. Starting today is so much better than even tomorrow let alone next year. There is a chasm between hubris and self-doubt after all.
And for each of us I just know that there are people out there that we touched, inspired, helped, without us ever knowing it. We are powerful. We do lift each other up.
Some days I am nearly incapacitated thinking about what could be. What if we shared? What if we were kind? What if we were brave? What if we never spoke or acted when feeling triggered by anger or fear or any of those other lesser productive ways of being. I’ve read that there is more than enough food in the world to feed everyone, we just waste it in a myriad of ways. There is enough sunshine falling on the planet to replace all non-renewable energy sources if we decided to harness it. I know I can never see all the beautiful places in the world, let alone my country, or even likely all the national parks.
Why do we work so hard to remain unhappy, unhealthy, un-kind? Mea Culpa! I am right there with all of you on this one! Knowing what some of the important questions might be is far from having any idea what any of the answers could be let alone making the changes to harvest those fruits.
How are you powerful beyond your wildest dreams? What are you willing to commit to in order to share these super-powers with the rest of us? I am committing to having at least one “Joy Division” gathering before the calendar turns to ‘25. I am committing to hiding-no-more, fearing no-more, exploring how I and my ideas (and Love, cannot forget Love) might be powerful (beyond measure). I will fail some days, some months. I will go backwards at times. If you could help pick me up as well as challenge me sometimes I promise to do the same for you.
